Auto-follow - Try raising the background FPS to 15-20 in the eq graphics menu settings. You'd get a lot of value out of mq2eqwire if you haven't tried that yet too. It turns off rendering for background toons while increasing overall performance.
Also consider using other follow methods like mq2nav which doesn't really care about distance/follow. It just runs each toon on their own path. Even my clunker computer can handle running 6 guys across a zone if I've got a "/nav" to loc or a toon that's already there.
For your specs, I'd probably drop to a lower graphics card unless you're using it for other games or really want to have EQ at max settings all the time. For running a lot of toons, pure memory is the main trick. Allow 1 GB for each toon you want to add, plus a little cushion for win10's memory hog stuff.
For raiding, you could downgrade some models to classic ones or even run stickfigures. This saves a lot of graphics resources.