Pre-Qualifier for a new, unofficial NA.com Competition sponsored by NA.com (1 Viewer)

[Deafdumbandblind]

Hi peeps,

I had a great idea for a competition and proposed it to the NA.com admin guys but apparently this isn't their real jobs and they don't get paid for it - which sounds illegal to me - so they suggested that I take it on.

Here's the deal:

There have been some great posts on NA.com - some funny, some psychotic and frankly some that may have been written by little furry aliens (extra-terrestrial variety o/c).

This is a competition to find the best single post on NA.com in teh world! Ever! Yes really!

Who decides? YOU DO!

Yes, we're going to vote on it from a short-list of the 10 best contenders.

Since no single person can be arsed trawling their way through 1000s of posts I'm going to ask you sucke..I mean great people, the NA-massive, to put what you believe to be the best post on this thread here.

Then I, with a little steering from the NA.com admin (hopefully), will choose the 10 finalist quotes that will be entered into a poll vote.

Remember, anyone can propose a post here BUT you have to register on NA.com to vote on the Poll.

"What's the prize?" I hear you say.

On agreement from NA.com, the Author of the winning post will be granted the title:

WINNER OF TEH INTARNET

Closing date for proposed Posts is:
12-NOON (GMT) on MONDAY 19th FEB

P.S. I was going to ask you to try and number them in order but frankly I think that's pushing my luck!
P.P.S. I got $10 on Ripperjack

 

[Runned]

So wait, the person who finds the best comment gets the prize? or the person who originally posted it gets the prize? THIS NEEDS CLARIFICATION!

 

[colekutz]

The best post is the funny man Slayer Neary who was in love with the elf.

 

[Deafdumbandblind]

So wait, the person who finds the best comment gets the prize? or the person who originally posted it gets the prize? THIS NEEDS CLARIFICATION!

The person who wrote the winning ORIGINAL POST gets the title.

e.g.

Say I propose in this tthread that one of the finalist posts should be:

By Runned:

So wait, the person who finds the best comment gets the prize? or the person who originally posted it gets the prize? THIS NEEDS CLARIFICATION!

If the above quote should get the mosts votes in the forthcoming Poll then YOU, RUNNED, would get the title as stated above.

It's one of those kinda altruistic or self-less voting competitions. :p

 

[Deafdumbandblind]

The best post is the funny man Slayer Neary who was in love with the elf.

I need quotes dammit, gimme a QUOTE and NAME!

 

[Runned]

I've made funnier posts than that :cross:

 

[colekutz]

I need quotes dammit, gimme a QUOTE and NAME!

I am sorry here is a quote and name

Jason (The Slayer) Neary's Avatar
Jason (The Slayer) Neary Jason (The Slayer) Neary is offline
Moderator

Join Date: Mar 2006
Posts: 6
Default Oh Starrholder, Could you be the One?
Oh Starrholder, you have enchanted this luckless troubadour with your classic beauty and clever intellect. I remember our first pick-up group. We were waiting outside the instance together when I asked "Pardon me fairest maiden, may I request a flask of your finest crystal water? I am but a lonely wanderer who has a thirst to quench". You typed "lol" triggering your Night Elf's laughter emote. When I heard your lilting laughter my heart sang.

Right then I knew it was that cruel mistress called love. She wrapped her thorny hands around my gentle heart and pulled me into her bittersweet embrace.

In the instance it was business as usual. I was the stalwart knight, using my superior defensive abilities to keep the rest of my party safe. With your high attack power and relatively low armor rating, I knew you would be a prime target for our enemies. But you knew you could rest easy behind my armored visage.

Did you see how close I stayed to you? Nary a malevolent creature breached my shield wall to mar your flawless beauty. You and I stayed in perfect rhythm. You cast Fire Ball and I Heroically Striked. I Overpowered and you Frost Novaed. You Polymorphed and I started shaking.

I kept the quips rolling throughout the instance: "You’re just taking two empty halves of coconuts and bangin' them together!" and when I was the only person to survive the Rattlegore encounter I yelled "Am I the last one? I AM the last one!" But as you well know, the laughter at my wit was sparse.

I had hoped that your silence was indicative of your insecurities; that you were as nervous as I over our budding love. But worry not, when something between two people is so right, there is no way it can go wrong.

I was so intoxicated by our love that I could barely focus. Unfortunately though, all good things must come to an end. And with Ras Frostwhsiper down, it was time to end our night. But I was not ready for our evening to be finished. I inquired whether anyone else in the group wanted to try another instance.

As you recall the precocious priest was the first to speak up "tired goin to bed". Curse him and his insolent tongue! Once the thought had been put in my fair lady's mind, I knew you were more inclined to follow suit.

Coyly you mused "yeah i think ill go to bed to". I knew that if I wanted to make a move it would have to be soon. Do you remember our conversation together? Perhaps the excitement has waned over the past few weeks or maybe time has put a haze over your memory. Fortunately for you I had my chatlog on so you may better remember our exchange:

[XDragonslyerX] says: Twas quite a good evening
XDragonslyerX loosens his chain vest and sits on a nearby stump
[Starrholder] says: ya
[XDragonslyerX] says: Curse the gods for not dropping my set piece item!
XDragonslyerX drops down on one knee and swears vengeance
[Starrholder] says: haha
[Starrholder] says: you talk funny
XDragonslyerX tickles Starrholder playfully
[Starrholder] says: heh well i better call it a nite
[XDragonslyerX] says: Before you leave m'lady, may I interest you in flask of Goldshire's finest Pinot Noir?
[Starrholder] says: uh maybe some other time
[XDragonslyerX] says: Shall we set the time and place now?
[Starrholder] says: um, no thats ok, thx tho
[XDragonslyerX] says: Then I shall record your name to my list of allies and eagerly await the next time our paths cross!
XDragonslyerX pulls out his quill pen and records all of Starrholder's information
[Starrholder] says: k
[Starrholder] says: bye

After adding your name to my friends list, I took a few screenshots of you hearthing out of the dungeon -- so I may always have that memory. Sometimes I pull up those pictures and try to relive our magical evening together. How long ago that seems…

Have you not received my letters? I have written you every day we've been apart! I hope you understand the anguish in my soul at the passing of each second we are not together. But I understand more than anyone that absence makes the heart grow fonder.

How excited I was to finally see you log in last Thursday. I petitioned you not once, not twice, but thrice before you finally responded:

[Starrholder] whispers: oh hey
To [Starrholder]: Hello there! For a second I thought maybe you didn't remember me!
[Starrholder] whispers: oh yeah
To [Starrholder]: It is no matter! Have you gotten my letters?
[Starrholder] whispers: yeah
[Starrholder] whispers: thx.. ok i better be going
To [Starrholder]: Must you depart so soon? Alas, I have waited so long for this moment, it hurts me that you must leave so abruptly.
No player named ‘Starrholder’ is currently playing.

That last conversation has gotten me worried. You were so rushed; so hurried. I wonder if you are ok? Perhaps you are at the constant whim of an evil stepfather. Or maybe trapped in a loveless marriage; waiting for a tall, 15 stone man to free you.

Oh Starrholder, please stay well while I gather the information on how to contact you at your home. Your powerful prince in shining armor is not far from your rescue!
Reply With Quote

 

[Gaston]

The best post is the funny man Slayer Neary who was in love with the elf.

/agree

 

[Deafdumbandblind]

You know it doesn't have to be a quote from an article. It can be from reply to an article or from a post on the forums.

How about this one which was, sad to say, a post I made when I was a repressed WoW nerd and really didn't have a clue about NA.com was really about....hmmm..much like I am now actually.

It was in response to Franky's "You are now Hated by the Argent Dawn" article.

07-13-2006, 12:30 PM
Unregistered Posts: n/a

You loser slime

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What's funny is that you're a sad, fat, spotty little man with no real friends whose life is so boring that he has to think up ways to get attention and spoil other people's games.

You haven't got a girlfriend (who you don't pay for) and, no, the Fedex lady who says "HI" to you when she delivers yet more nerdy gear to your rat-infested hovel is NOT your girlfriend and neither are the bits of flesh displayed in your already-legendary porn collection.

It's some consolation to the rest of us that the chances are you'll die young because of your pitiously unhealthy lifestyle and leave the rest of us in peace.

I'm worried that the post was so uber 1337 that it killed Franky outright since I've not seen many posts from him since then.

 

[Runned]

I'm pretty sure frybread saw franky's story on a wow forum and asked him if he could post it here. He wasn't really a writer for the site and already had a built in audience (thus the million something views), he never actually posted here either. I'm sure he read the comments though.

 

[Deafdumbandblind]

02-09-2007, 02:02 AM post #28
Unregistard
John Q. Member




Join Date: Dec 2005
Location: frostmane
Posts: 93


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MANCHEESE

This one was in response to Ripperjack's "Now everyone's a geek? wtf??" thread.


I believe Unregistard's post adds incredible value.

 

[Reygar]

bah screw contests, just make me teh winnar of the intarnetz!! ROFLZ

and if you ask yourself why, don't. just do it. simple. case closed and everyone that matters is happy.

 

[Getpaid]

I cried for Sir Neary...
I haven't read enough of these posts to know what would be deserving of such a title, BUT I do like the pig avatar.

 

[SGMessiah]

I thought the one with Blart, where he gave away "free" gold to people in redridge was awsome, maybe not a quote but damn I almost pissed my pants seeing the masacre of the poor gulible lowbies

 

[Gouka]

Mission failure on your top 10, I'd say. That's what you get for posting when I'm on holiday! pms :sissyfight:
Anyway, comment-wise, I think Unregistard (and unregistered) had me snort out coffee a couple of times, but, since I'm a nerd, I'm too damn lazy to look for a quote.

 

[Ged]

On agreement from NA.com, the Author of the winning post will be granted the title:

WINNER OF TEH INTARNET

I vote for the Starrholder one by Jason(Theslayer), the one colekutz voted for:P

 

[colekutz]

I vote for the Starrholder one by Jason(Theslayer), the one colekutz voted for:P

We are so delighted that you agree with us but we fear deafdumbnblind will holler at you for not posting a quote as he did us.

 

[Unregistard]

adds incredible value.

see THAT? ^^^

VALUE ADDED BIOTCH.

pms

 

[Deafdumbandblind]

I vote for the Starrholder one by Jason(Theslayer), the one colekutz voted for:P

Details, man! I. NEED. DETAAAIIIIILS!!! :mad: :rr: :sissyfight: pms

 

[Ged]

Details, man! I. NEED. DETAAAIIIIILS!!! :mad: :rr: :sissyfight: pms

Argh, do I really have to copy exactly the same thing-.-

Oh Starrholder, Could you be the One?
Oh Starrholder, you have enchanted this luckless troubadour with your classic beauty and clever intellect. I remember our first pick-up group. We were waiting outside the instance together when I asked "Pardon me fairest maiden, may I request a flask of your finest crystal water? I am but a lonely wanderer who has a thirst to quench". You typed "lol" triggering your Night Elf's laughter emote. When I heard your lilting laughter my heart sang.

Right then I knew it was that cruel mistress called love. She wrapped her thorny hands around my gentle heart and pulled me into her bittersweet embrace.

In the instance it was business as usual. I was the stalwart knight, using my superior defensive abilities to keep the rest of my party safe. With your high attack power and relatively low armor rating, I knew you would be a prime target for our enemies. But you knew you could rest easy behind my armored visage.

Did you see how close I stayed to you? Nary a malevolent creature breached my shield wall to mar your flawless beauty. You and I stayed in perfect rhythm. You cast Fire Ball and I Heroically Striked. I Overpowered and you Frost Novaed. You Polymorphed and I started shaking.

I kept the quips rolling throughout the instance: "You're just taking two empty halves of coconuts and bangin' them together!" and when I was the only person to survive the Rattlegore encounter I yelled "Am I the last one? I AM the last one!" But as you well know, the laughter at my wit was sparse.

I had hoped that your silence was indicative of your insecurities; that you were as nervous as I over our budding love. But worry not, when something between two people is so right, there is no way it can go wrong.

I was so intoxicated by our love that I could barely focus. Unfortunately though, all good things must come to an end. And with Ras Frostwhsiper down, it was time to end our night. But I was not ready for our evening to be finished. I inquired whether anyone else in the group wanted to try another instance.

As you recall the precocious priest was the first to speak up "tired goin to bed". Curse him and his insolent tongue! Once the thought had been put in my fair lady's mind, I knew you were more inclined to follow suit.

Coyly you mused "yeah i think ill go to bed to". I knew that if I wanted to make a move it would have to be soon. Do you remember our conversation together? Perhaps the excitement has waned over the past few weeks or maybe time has put a haze over your memory. Fortunately for you I had my chatlog on so you may better remember our exchange:

[XDragonslyerX] says: Twas quite a good evening
XDragonslyerX loosens his chain vest and sits on a nearby stump
[Starrholder] says: ya
[XDragonslyerX] says: Curse the gods for not dropping my set piece item!
XDragonslyerX drops down on one knee and swears vengeance
[Starrholder] says: haha
[Starrholder] says: you talk funny
XDragonslyerX tickles Starrholder playfully
[Starrholder] says: heh well i better call it a nite
[XDragonslyerX] says: Before you leave m'lady, may I interest you in flask of Goldshire's finest Pinot Noir?
[Starrholder] says: uh maybe some other time
[XDragonslyerX] says: Shall we set the time and place now?
[Starrholder] says: um, no thats ok, thx tho
[XDragonslyerX] says: Then I shall record your name to my list of allies and eagerly await the next time our paths cross!
XDragonslyerX pulls out his quill pen and records all of Starrholder's information
[Starrholder] says: k
[Starrholder] says: bye

After adding your name to my friends list, I took a few screenshots of you hearthing out of the dungeon -- so I may always have that memory. Sometimes I pull up those pictures and try to relive our magical evening together. How long ago that seems…

Have you not received my letters? I have written you every day we've been apart! I hope you understand the anguish in my soul at the passing of each second we are not together. But I understand more than anyone that absence makes the heart grow fonder.

How excited I was to finally see you log in last Thursday. I petitioned you not once, not twice, but thrice before you finally responded:

[Starrholder] whispers: oh hey
To [Starrholder]: Hello there! For a second I thought maybe you didn't remember me!
[Starrholder] whispers: oh yeah
To [Starrholder]: It is no matter! Have you gotten my letters?
[Starrholder] whispers: yeah
[Starrholder] whispers: thx.. ok i better be going
To [Starrholder]: Must you depart so soon? Alas, I have waited so long for this moment, it hurts me that you must leave so abruptly.
No player named ‘Starrholder' is currently playing.

That last conversation has gotten me worried. You were so rushed; so hurried. I wonder if you are ok? Perhaps you are at the constant whim of an evil stepfather. Or maybe trapped in a loveless marriage; waiting for a tall, 15 stone man to free you.

Oh Starrholder, please stay well while I gather the information on how to contact you at your home. Your powerful prince in shining armor is not far from your rescue!

There ye go!

 

[Deafdumbandblind]

So, you want me to put the stalker on the top 10??

 

[Ged]

So, you want me to put the stalker on the top 10??

Yep :S

 

[colekutz]

So, you want me to put the stalker on the top 10??

Such a man who was so silly as to fall in love with that which is only the lights from a video game made us roar with laughter.

May we suggest all who do not agree read this story again but do so with a frothy float in one hand and a spoon of a very long stem in the other.

 

[Deafdumbandblind]

This one was a gud'un too..

El Presidente




Join Date: Oct 2006
Location: Scilla
Posts: 248


--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

L

I had to hold my guts in.........LLLLLLLLLLoL

 

[Deafdumbandblind]

ROFL at this one too...

Runned
Fast and Danger




Join Date: Nov 2005
Location: Chill City, USA
Posts: 801



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my tables!

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Pull up, hop out, all in one motion, dancin' on the hood while the car's still rollin'

 

[Ged]

I'm gonna back away slowly.

And where is the title of the post it was on!

 

[colekutz]

we are very much wishing to inquire who has won this contest.

 

[dermien]

[Albenkook] whispers: ha ha everyone hates you

Blart wins.

 

[isobelle]

nobody loves iso.

 

[Gouka]

First: Go QQ some more, you noob :ohyeah: lol

Second: I want to nominate this

YOGURT, RUNNED.

YOGURT.

Especially in the context of the whole thread... :yea:

 

[(Un)conscious]

Although I agree with Colekutz (Twas pure genius) for me the best post EVER has to be:

12-06-2006, 12:41 AM
Poistiant
John Q. Member Join Date: Oct 2006
Posts: 39



--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Quote:
Originally Posted by Ripperjack
I'm sick to death of real girls who happen to play games, go on and make a big EMO melodrama about it with posts such at this. It is this sort of "Oh woe is thee, Oh who is thee, LOOK AT ME! LOOK AT ME!" posts that make me want to puke.

OK... so you're a girl, you play games, fine... you don't have to make a whole episode of the Bold and Beautiful about it.

Also, these sorts of girls remind me of the prissy, frigid, cock-teases you see in high school. You know the ones, that run around with their assets bulging from their tight little tops. Who make flirty advances and like to be looked at, but woe is the guy who actually tries to hit one up. Then all sorts of accusations of sexual harassment, rape and incident acts are slandered upon the hapless guy who succumbed to the sirens call.

If you want to play the game, leave your IRL gender at the login screen. I mean this is MEANT to be a role-playing game after all.

If you want a gamer guy to phuck, might I suggest www.okcupid.com, and put "gamer girl" and "warcraft" in your interests.

BTW... I have a "love/hate" relationship with gamer girls. I love them and they hate me... go figure.

This thread is serious business, perhaps even more serious than a rhino charging your ass.