There are a few ways.
1. Create a shortcut of eqgame.exe
2. Use WinEQ
3. Use ISBoxer
For single-boxing just making a shortcut of eqgame.exe should be sufficient.
In your Everquest directory right click on "eqgame.exe" and select "Create Shortcut". This should create a new file called "eqgame - Shortcut".
Now right-click that and select "Properties". In the Target box, after eqgame exe, add a space then type patchme
Before: C:\Games\EQLive\eqgame.exe
After: C:\Games\EQLive\eqgame.exe patchme
If your directory structure has spaces, then there should be quotes around everything in the target box, just add the patchme after the last quote..
If boxing, I would suggest using either WinEQ2.0 or ISBoxer and set it up with the patchme parameters.
A caveat to this is when there is a patch, you will have to use the launcher on any installed EQ directories to let the patch process, then you can go back to this method.